The fastest one wins the race?

Two Fridays ago, the following conversation took place at my hubby's workplace:

"You have a baby girl right?" a woman's voice bellowed intrusively.

Hubby answered in the affirmative.

"Tulah, you tak kuat, that's why a girl," she bluntly offered. (You're physically weak, that's why it's a girl)

Hubby replied emphatically "That explains your father then," to the gales of laughter from her two male colleagues.

She was beyond horrified and managed only to muster "Tulah malas nak cakap dengan (insert hubby's name), mesti ada nak jawab." (That's why I don't like talking to (insert hubby's name), he always have something back to say)

"Lain kali cakap baik baik, saya jawab baik baik," was hubby's stern answer, before turning on his heel. (If you talk in a nice manner, then I'd answer back nicely as well)

This annoying hussy (though better, harsh adjectives came to mind at the time) is known for her stupid, uncalled-for comments but this particular incident really takes the cake!

I mean, who was she to pass judgment on who has a weaker set of sperms and who doesn't? Or maybe she was referring to my husband's genteel (read: less than macho) appearance which naturally implies an inability to produce a male offspring. How narrow-minded can someone be? I would have thought for a university degree holder she could have easily figured out that genteel manners are a sign of good breeding and upbringing. Alas, such simple logic is lost on this emaciated maiden.

If macho-ness is the reliable and proven indicator of conceiving boys, how come Malek Nor is out of the closet, and my favourite Hollywood heartthrob, Brad Pitt has a baby girl, with Angelina Jolie? This sweeping fallacy is preposterous!

Actually, I'm not completely surprised that such silly notion still resides amongst some Malaysians. I'm sure some myths with respect to choosing the baby's sex are being perpetuated in different cultures as well. But in this instance, I was shocked that it was spewed out of the mouth of a loutish female!

This encounter also reminds me of a conversation I had with a girlfriend, close to 10 years ago, who intimated that her husband wanted their firstborn to be a boy as it would be a sign of his 'strong' sexual prowess. What gives??

Of course, back then I was single and clueless and couldn't confute her with much conviction, not without an arsenal of ObGyn information up my sleeves. It is a totally different story now, thanks in part to my maternal status and to the wonders of Internet which furnishes me with enough a repository on the birds and the bees.

More precisely, all this idle talk got me thinking as to whether there is a modicum of truth behind the claim that having a male firstborn attests to the father's out-and-out machismo.

After trawling the cyberspace for answers, here are some interesting facts to chew on (doctors or pre-meds out there please correct me if I'm wrong :) ):

1. Alkalinity favours the conception of a boy.



2. Acidity favours the conception of a girl.



3. X-sperm (Girl) are: bigger - slower - more resilient in the woman's reproductive tract



4. Y-sperm (Boy) are: smaller - faster - weak - less resilient in the reproductive tract.



5. The pH of the women's tract is therefore very important. However, some women have a reproductive tract that is naturally very acidic and have a hard time conceiving boys.



6. Timing of intercourse during the monthly cycle - the closer the time is to ovulation, the better the chances to have a boy, because the y-sperms are faster and tend to get to the egg first. Vice-versa, if you want to conceive a girl.



7. Sperm count - a low sperm count obviously doesn't favor either sex, but a high sperm count purportedly favours boys.


You can read more about this womanly issue here and here.

As such, many intertwining factors are at work here which need to be further unravelled on the genetic level if one were to accurately guess whose biological urges or mechanisms - the man or the woman - are behind the sex of a baby. Until such results are out, it'd be utterly futile, if not completely foolish, to point your fingers to only one member of a beautiful union.

For instance, a woman's naturally acidic reproductive tract might be the overriding reason as to why a couple conceived a girl, as opposed to the alleged low sperm count of the man. Also, ironically the much coveted Y-sperm, which is responsible for the conception of a baby boy, is IN FACT 'weak' in its spindly, cellular form.

In the final analysis, I believe that it is Allah the Most Supreme and All-Knowing who determines the gender of our offspring(s). Instead of complaining over the lack of either a male heir or a princess, we should always be thankful to be bestowed and entrusted with another life who depends entirely on us for support, guidance, nourishment and most importantly, love.

Even if we can't change the narrow perception of some people, we can take heart from knowing that every child is God's unique and special gift. Don't ever for a moment lose sight of that.

Image taken from here.