Facebook Fiend

Hi. My name is Theta. I'm a Facebook addict.

I have wanted to write about this newfangled fixation for the longest time, but you guess it, the time spent on Facebook (FB) has somehow derailed me from penning my thoughts down. That, and other regular interminable distractions (read: Sadia).

When my dear twin sister invited me to join the crazy bandwagon (as it has been quoted by someone in my husband's FB circle) back in December last year, I declined on the basis of rejecting the 'mainstream' movement. (I could just imagine Nina rolling her eyes at my attempt to be 'different' :) ) Besides, I told myself, the long-ish form - at least that's how it appeared to me in the older FB version - one has to fill to enter this 'cult' just put me off.

Hah! The snobbery of it all. As this incident goes to show, you should never ever say never. Because once you tread into the beautiful unknown, there is no turning back. At least, that's how it applies in my sorry case.

Ahhh, the sheer embarrassment of it all.

In February this year, I finally decided to give FB a try after reading to no end about it on various blogs that I follow - how they are hooked to it, the different, interesting applications involved and meeting friends - old and new - online. In my weak defense, curiosity got the best of me. I wanted to check out what the hullabaloo is all about.

Little did I know I would be sucked into a powerful vortex that seems to turn on its own axis. Once I finished with the form-filling part and had my first view inside the sacred portal, I literally ran all over the place - finding people I might know, adding new funky applications and accepting new gifts in return. For some inexplicable reason, I was completely entranced.

Nine months have passed since that fateful, hyperventilated day. I can safely say by the end of October, my euphoria has somewhat died down.

In fact, the end of Ramadan saw with it my usual interests taking a backseat to more pressing matters, like attending to Sadia and spending quality time with my loved ones (Unbeknownst to me then, my gradual lack of enthusiasm and acute fatigue were attributed to having conceived a baby).

Digression aside, I must reiterate that FB still figures largely in my life, and there is not a day where I will not take a peek at it (except of course, when I'm in rustic country). This almost morbid fascination with FB even boggles me. Surely I could just run away from such frivolous electronic affair. Then, how come the mind tells me no?

Sometime in early September - also the Ramadan month - I chanced upon a delightful exposition on this successful FB phenomenon. All of a sudden, everything that I'd ever mused about FB clicks together. The said article talks about the concept of 'ambient awareness' to explain the feverish rise in online form of contact.

It is, they say, very much like being physically near someone and picking up on his mood through the little things he does — body language, sighs, stray comments — out of the corner of your eye.

As a matter of fact, the current News Feed page on FB - the default Home page on everyone's FB account - is essential to this site's popularity. When News Feed was first introduced two years back however, people in general were initially mortified by the constant updates flashing across the page. Who broke up with whom, whose less than flattering photos were tagged and so forth had caused a thunderous uproar. Fortunately, the clamor died down within days after people got accustomed to this new feature. Many people were happy to receive tidbits about some of their friends which they would not normally know in real life.

Now that it is socially acceptable to showcase a snippet of your life in a blip-like manner on FB, the internet has seen a surge of 'microblogging' tools like Twitter in the past one year.

The phenomenon is quite different from what we normally think of as blogging, because a blog post is usually a written piece, sometimes quite long: a statement of opinion, a story, an analysis. But these new updates are something different. They’re far shorter, far more frequent and less carefully considered.

This brings me to another facet of FB - Status Update - which, like Twitter, has a limited number of characters to play with. Truth be told, it is the one I most utilize and look forward to each day. When I began using it, I even surprised myself that I didn't have any reservation towards it. Not even a teeny bit shy. I love skimming through Friends' status as well and, like the article elucidates this long-drawn exercise gives me a sense of the rhythms of their lives. When followed for an extended period, I get a feel of their ups-and-downs, personality streaks and other boring yet strangely meaningful information that make up a bigger picture.

This is the paradox of ambient awareness. Each little update — each individual bit of social information — is insignificant on its own, even supremely mundane. But taken together, over time, the little snippets coalesce into a surprisingly sophisticated portrait of your friends’ and family members’ lives, like thousands of dots making a pointillist painting.

An 'extrasensory perception' gained from such unending virtual contact might be superficial at best, but the fact remains people do find the time to compose their thoughts on Status Updates in order to attract cursory or loyal readers.

While the author discussed the dangers of dabbling too much in ambient awareness activities - spreading oneself too thin for real-life emotional relationships, the 'parasocial' phenomenon of developing a misleading deep connection with someone whom you hardly know, and the dilemma of wanting to extricate yourself from your own noseyed 'small village' of FB (privacy, ex-lover issues, tagging of your old horrible pics, for instance) or staying put just to see what others are talking about you - , I am more inclined to agree on this point - creating a more self-aware, reflective individual.

The act of stopping several times a day to observe what you’re feeling or thinking can become, after weeks and weeks, a sort of philosophical act. It’s like the Greek dictum to “know thyself,” or the therapeutic concept of mindfulness.

As the Status Updates demonstrate, you cannot help but to wonder what had possessed you to rant about certain problems and therefore make a conscious decision to tackle them better. You in turn become more objective. That's the best side-effect for emotional-laden persons such as me. Though the pull of FB inevitably remains, I'm increasingly 'aware' where my priorities lie and that face-to-face interactions are more precious and rewarding than the FB versions I might engage in any given day.

Oh, by the way, my FB Dunbar Number currently stands at 123. That's propitious enough, don't you think? :)






First image taken from here.

Second image stolen from here.

Last image filched from here.