As promised in my earlier posting, I turn my attention now to my 'Persandingan' ceremony which is equivalent to The Big Bash Wedding Day throughout the continental world.
After a surreal experience of officially becoming someone's wife the previous night, I was so exhausted that I quickly passed out on my bed as soon as I cleansed off my heavy make-up.
I still didn't sleep in the 'wedding boudoir' since my husband didn't spend the night - customarily, the husband would only do so after the Persandingan so he would be able to get acquainted with the bride's family.
My parents' bedroom was transformed especially for the special day since other bedrooms were not amply spaced for decoration and beautification purposes. In a sense, it's awkward having to sleep in that fancy boudoir, knowing quite well despite its festive and merry feeling, it was still your parents' bedroom.
Anyhow, I am digressing.
Following a refreshing shower, I tried to eat some breakfast but found myself getting nervous with the Big Day. Around me, the hustle and bustle of people - caterers, tent decorators and relatives - since early morning added to the euphoria of weddings.
A constant worrywart, I was also anxious whether my make-up artist would turn up late again. As this thought crossed my mind, I got a phone call from him. "Kat mana dah ni (Where are you now?)?" I asked. "Alamak, pukul berapa I patut datang? (Oh gosh! What time I'm supposed to be there?)" he responded. I was aghast. How could he forget after our frantic rush to finish up last night?!
He then hanged up promising to be at my house as soon as possible. I was about to get all worked up again when he (and a friend-in-training) suddenly showed up at our front porch. He was toying with me! He just wanted to test me! Luckily, I HAD my sense of humour that morning. This was coupled with the fact I needed a make-up artist. So I had to behave and watch my mouth. But to tell you the truth, I was too dazed to care.
As for the make-up, I was glad he came extra early since we did finish quite later than expected. Overall, I was pleased with his meticulous and professional work. It was everything I had wanted and didn't mind having to part with a large sum of money for such impressionable results.
Thereafter, I waited for the groom and his entourage to arrive. It was nerve-wrecking. I'm quite aversive to large crowds and didn't really like the idea of being on a dais (or 'pelamin') for display which is wont for traditional Malay weddings. The only thing that appeased me was that the fact it was our BIG day and to be lavished in such vainglory was a once-in-a-lifetime chance.
The groom et al had arrived early but their accompanied 'kompang' group (kompang is a traditional hand-held drum and played in a manner similar to the tambourine) had yet to show up. My mom's cousin who was in charge of bringing them was not doing his job properly! The kompang group finally showed up after a half an hour's worth of wait. As my husband was about to set foot inside my parent's house compound, the rain miraculously started to fall. It was more like a rainstorm! Strong, tempestuous wind and torrential rain!
Like it or not, the show must go on. The kompang's percussive, melodic beat heralded the blissful reunion of the newly married. Amid the cacophony of heavy rain and crowd taking shelter from the rain, the ritualistic 'union' of bride and groom, however, was in disarray. On the bright side, the elements of nature helped to conceal the flaw. Now I understand why in some cultures, they have wedding rehearsals.
We were then ushered indoors to sit on our fabulously adorned pelamin where relatives would take turn to bless us with ceremonial rose water, flower petals and 'bunga rampai' (or finely sliced pot-pourri of fragrant plants used for Malay weddings).
Before this took place, a relative (that mom's cousin who was late with the kompang group) offered a short prayer for the newlyweds. Okay, for such a beautiful tribute, you're off the hook. :-)
Funnily, perhaps through divine intervention, the rain stopped soon after we settled onto our seats at the dais.
Following the pelamin ritual, it was time to eat at our 'meja beradab' or newlywed luncheon table. But no one came to usher us to the table. We just sat there at the dais, looking at each other and being dumbfounded. Momentarily stumped, we decided to take things literally into our own hands as my husband grabbed my hand and we walked hand-in-hand to the table unescorted.
Of course, at the table, we were not supposed to eat to our hearts' content. We must behave according to decorum. The beautiful food presentation was too nice to be eaten, my mother-in-law commented. But I was famished and wanted to eat more than what was deemed appropriate. Alas, my husband stopped me. He didn't want me to ruin my make-up. Hehe.
To mollify my desire to eat, my husband humoured me by assenting to my inquiries of who's who at the VIP tables. His boss was one of them. While sitting at our luncheon table, the emcee entertained the crowd with a brief on our personal lives (how we met, where we went to school, etc) to which he liberally embellished some truths. We couldn't help but laugh!
As the day wound down - around 3-4 p.m. - we were more relaxed and got the chance to talk to some friends who stayed behind to chat and wish us well.
After retiring shortly to our boudoir to wash out the make-up and getting out of our ceremonial clothes, we opened our wedding presents at night, surrounded by my close relatives (My husband's entourage had left earlier following the wedding luncheon but before they took pictures with us via the professional photo-op service).
The gifts ranged from personal (lingerie!) to mostly domesticated items (like toaster, barbeque set, DVD player, electric kettle, bedsheets, etc).
Looking back, it was a hectic but worthwhile day. I finally ended up with my beloved anamcara!
